Get rid of Twitterers that I follow | Twitter

Some time back I starting using one of those auto-following services offered by SocialOomph because like many new Twitterers, I thought anyone who followed me was worth following back. Wrong, as I and maybe you yourself discovered your tweet stream fills with marketers and dubious "experts" promoting themselves, their products, and their services. Not to mention all the p**n stars. The inescapable down side of Twitter.

The most undesirable aspect of this I feel is that you are actually following these people. This of course will be a reflection on your own integrity because by following them you advertise to the world that you approve of them.

I have decided therefore that I will no longer use any of these services. Hence forth I will only follow those who I make a decision to follow because I want to. People who I find interesting, who are willing to take part in a discussion rather than a one way diatribe.

I will now also start to go through the stream of people who I currently follow and ditch those that I do not want to be associated with. Conducting a quick search using Google  showed me that there is a whole raft of services and programmes that you can subscribe to or purchase to clean up your followers for you. Am I going to use one, am I now going to tell you the one I have found that you simply can not do without? Absolutely not. I am going to do it the long way, the manual way, the way that will involve more time but hopefully at the end of the process will produce a list of people that I want to follow, that will have been my decision and will not have involved me passing on my password to anyone.

Today's Jokes | One Liners

Well folks I thought it about time we had another selection of short gags, so here are Today's Jokes and One Liners.

My boss said to me “If you are able to learn from your mistakes, you must have learned a lot today.”

90% of men kiss their wife goodbye when they leave the house. The rest kiss their house goodbye when they leave the wife.

A baby sitter is a teenager acting like an adult while the adults are out acting like teenagers.

Have you been out to the post Christmas sales looking for bargains, or have you been looking for things you don't need at a price you just can't resist.

If a thing is worth doing, it has already been done.

Did you get that feeling over Christmas that sometimes too much to drink isn't enough.

I told my friend I wanted to make a comeback. “How can you make a comeback when you have not been anywhere” she replied.

I told my boss I always need more than one go to get things right. He suggested I take up sky diving.

Losing a husband can be hard. In my case it was almost impossible.

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Hope you liked that selection of Today's Jokes and One Liners.

I Belong to Glasgow

Glasgow Rangers manager flies to Baghdad to watch a young Iraqi play Football and is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over to Scotland.

Two weeks later the 'Gers are 4-0 down to Aberdeen with only 20 minutes left. The manager gives the young Iraqi striker the nod and on he goes.

The lad is a sensation - scores 5 goals in 20 minutes and wins the game for Rangers! The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and the media love the new star.

When the player comes off the pitch he phones his mum to tell her about his first day in Scottish football.
"Hello mum, guess what?" he says in an Iraqi accent. "I played for 20 minutes today, we were 4-0 down but I scored 5 and we won. Everybody loves me, the fans, the media, they all love me."

" Wonderful," says his mum, "Let me tell you about my day.

Your father got shot in the street and robbed, your sister and I were ambushed, gang raped and beaten and your brother has joined a gang of looters, and all while you were having such great time."

The young lad is very upset, "What can I say mum, but I'm so sorry."

"Sorry?!!! Sorry?!!!" says his mum, "It's your bloody fault we moved to Glasgow in the first place!"

Search for a Sat Nav continued

Well I have been looking around on the internet at options for a Sat Nav and have a slightly better understanding (I think) of what I want (See my last post Search for a Sat nav). There seems to be some good deals at argos, most of the units have money off at the moment. At one point I thought I had narrowed the choice down, until that is I started looking at customer reviews. That merely succeeded in throwing me into total confusion again.

One Sat Nav model that I was considering appears to have issues with the software and with boot up time, the time it takes to aquire a GPS signal. I must confess that I had not even considered things like that at all. I guess these are some of the points I need to be aware of.

I will study this Sat Nav business some more, try to learn more about what issues need to be taken into consideration, then report back.

Watch for my next post on the Sat Nav

Search for a Sat Nav

Yes folks I am currently engaged in a Search for a Sat Nav, but which one and where from, I have no idea.

Having witnessed their use and then experienced several recent incidents of getting hopelessly confused at large junctions and roundabouts while attempting to follow instructions taken from a map, I have decided the time to get a Sat Nav for myself, is here.

But here-in lies the quandary. Having taken a quick scan at what is on offer, I am totally bemused. There are so many to choose from and the prices vary enormously. If I buy a cheap model will I find that it sends me the wrong way up a one way street or invites me to turn into a canal? If I buy a more expensive one, will I be paying for features that I do not want?

What I do know is that I want a straightforward Sat Nav that will give me directions and inform me in plain easy to understand language what roads to follow and where I need to turn. What I do not want is anything to make life more complicated or that will involve wading through a giant manual full of instructions before I can even determine how to switch it on. I do not want fancy gimmicks or advanced features, or one that will play MP3's, sing songs or dance a jig. I also do not want to buy a Sat Nav then find that in a few months time I need to download the latest update to it's software (at a price) in order for it to continue to do it's job.

So there in a nut shell is what I am after, please leave a comment if you can help in any way towards my search for a Sat Nav.

Funny Short Stories | Gotta Love the Old folks

Here is another of the funny short stories that make me laugh. I do not know the originator of this latest funny short story, it was forwarded to me by email. It guess it's one of the many that do the rounds. Hope you like it.

Gotta Love the Old folks - funny short story

I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes. We decided to grab a bite at the food court.
I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue. My dad kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find him staring every time.

When the teenager had enough, he sarcastically asked, " What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?"

Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response; knowing he would have a good one. And in classic style he did not bat an eye in his response.

"Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son."

More funny short stories coming soon.
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England The Welfare State

Here is an advertisement I received by email, unfortunately I do not qualify.